Theo's Aunt Minnie Comes to Town
by TVTime
Summary: Liam and Theo have to pretend to be boyfriends when Theo's Aunt Minnie comes to town. Fortunately, it isn't too hard to fake. - Liam tried not to laugh as Aunt Minnie held the rim of her glass against the mouth of her Dread Doctor mask and took a noisy sip of ice water. "Liam, why didn't you get her a straw?" Theo asked. "Sorry, cuddlemuffin, I didn't think of it."


_A/N: This story was written for the 'Fake Relationship' day of Thiam Week 2017. It's a post-series story but doesn't really contain any series spoilers. There are a couple of inconsequential references to non-plot significant 6B events, but even those you'll likely only catch if you've already seen the season._

 **Theo** **'s Aunt Minnie Comes to Town**

"I need a favor."

Liam glanced over his shoulder at Theo as he sat down on the bed beside him. Liam was sprawled out on his stomach working on his calculus homework.

"Oh Theo, you don't even need to ask." Liam smiled sweetly at him, letting the points of his fangs show for effect. "The answer is no."

"C'mon, it's important." Theo gave Liam his innocent look, the one that always signaled he was up to something, and patted the back of Liam's thigh.

Liam cleared his throat and shifted his hips as heat pooled beneath Theo's hand. "What is it?" he asked to distract them both from the way his body was responding to Theo's touch.

"My Aunt Minnie is coming to town, and–"

"Wait, you have an aunt?" Liam sat up and folded his hands in his lap.

"Yeah." Theo repositioned around Liam, closing most of the space and brushing his knee against Liam's leg.

Liam leaned into him, pressing their shoulders together. Ever since Theo had moved into Liam's house and started sharing his room, the pair had been more physical with each. Liam didn't want to question why. All he knew was that they were getting along better, and Theo was being a decent person to Liam and the remaining Beacon Hills pack.

"I thought your family were all dead?" Liam kept his face and voice gentle as he raised the point. Theo was his friend now. He didn't want to hurt him.

"They are. Aunt Minnie's a Dread Doctor."

Liam flinched, a pang of fear stabbing his gut. "A Dread Doctor is coming to town?!"

"Yeah, but you'll like her."

"Why would I like her?"

"She's nice. She's The Pathologist's sister." Theo smirked at him. "She's The Bridgeologist."

"The what?" Liam furrowed his brow. "You mean like roads and bridges?"

"No, like the card game. She's really good at it. She's won tournaments all over the world."

"You can't be serious." Liam bumped his shoulder against Theo's and shook his head at him. "Stop messing around. I need to do my homework."

"I mean it, Liam," Theo said, nudging him back. "She was a biologist before she quit the group."

"But now all she does is play bridge?"

"That's not _all_ she does. She has other hobbies too – gardening, knitting, photography, taxidermy."

"Taxidermy? That's creepy."

"Well she is a Dread Doctor."

Liam sighed, his curiosity getting the better of him. "So what's the favor?"

"I wanna invite her over for dinner."

" _Here?_ "

Theo scowled at him. "Well I'd rather not hit a drive through and make her eat in my truck."

"But my parents–"

"I'll pick a night when they're on shifts at the hospital."

Liam hesitated. He was uncomfortable with the idea of having a Dread Doctor in his house, but he supposed she could get in regardless if she decided to, and he wanted Theo to feel at home here. "Fine. I guess I can hang out with Mason and Corey that night."

Theo's smile widened and he tilted his head, affecting an even more innocent look. Liam was in so much trouble.

"That's where the second part of the favor comes in. I need you to have dinner with us."

"Why?" Liam asked. Theo could smile at him all night, Liam wasn't going to budge...even if he had physically budged closer to Theo.

"She thinks we're dating. I need you to go along with it."

Liam's head snapped back. "Why would she think we were dating?"

Theo's hazel eyes sparkled with mischief. "Because I told her we were."

"Well then that is a good reason." Liam pouted his lips and gave a silly nod. There was no denying this conversation was way more fun than solving derivatives. "But why would you tell her that?"

"So she would stop worrying about me being alone. Besides, it was easier than explaining that I was sharing a room and a _bed_ with a guy who was just my..."

"Friend?"

Theo smiled softly. "Yeah friend."

Liam rolled his eyes and shoved Theo. "So you're asking me to be your pretend boyfriend?"

"Just for one night." Theo actually looked and smelled nervous. Liam wanted to tease him, but something about the vulnerable look on his face made Liam's chest tighten.

"Okay, sure."

Theo's face lit with a grin and he lunged forward, knocking Liam backward on the bed and initiating a wrestling match. Liam didn't _giggle_ of course, but he might have let out a few high pitched, quick laughs as he rolled around with Theo.

 **-000–**

Liam walked with Theo to the front door to answer it, and Theo wrapped an arm around Liam's waist before reaching for the knob with his other hand. This was already weird...even if Theo's arm around him didn't feel completely unnatural by this point in their friendship.

"Aunt Minnie!"

"Teddy!"

Theo let go of Liam and stepped forward to wrap the... _woman?_ up in a hug. She was short, several inches shorter than Liam, and had a slightly hunched back and frail build. She wore a face mask and brown leather suit in the style the other Dread Doctors had worn, but her face mask covered only her face itself. Thick, steel gray hair hung in curls around her head, and in place of the goggles the other doctors had worn were a pair of tortoise rimmed glasses. A lavender cardigan was buttoned around her shoulders over her leather suit, and orthopedic shoes adorned her feet.

A tinge of anxiety tickled the back of Liam's neck as he noted the familiar walking cane clutched in her crooked fingers as she embraced Theo. He didn't doubt that it contained a blade or that the elderly woman would be more difficult to overpower than she appeared.

She kissed Theo's cheek with the lips of her mask and stood on her toes to ruffle his hair.

"This is my boyfriend, Liam," Theo said, his arm around her shoulders as he guided her to Liam.

"Pleased to meet you, ma'am." Liam held out his hand. She took hold of it and tugged him forward, arching onto wobbly toes again and raising her trembling arms. Liam obliged her and stooped to allow the hug.

"Such an adorable little werewolf," She said in an echoing rasp as she kissed his cheek and squeezed his back. She smelled of hair spray and tanned hide. "Would you like to be something else too, dear?" she asked, releasing Liam. "A kanima tail might come in quite handy."

"Um, no thank you."

"Well just tell Teddy if you change your mind." A wrinkled eyelid appeared beneath one of her Coke-bottle lenses as she winked at him.

"Can I get you something to drink, Ms–"

"Minerva Wilbury, but please, call me Aunt Minnie."

"Can I get you something to drink, Aunt Minnie?" Liam asked with a polite smile. Theo was beaming him and had a hand on each of their backs.

"Do you have any rosehip tea?"

"I think we're fresh out."

"Then just a tumbler of scotch would be lovely."

Liam gaped at her and a dry, hacking laugh rang out from behind her mask. She assured him water would be fine and took a seat with Theo on the couch.

While Liam was in the kitchen getting their drinks, he checked on the roast his mom had put in the oven before she had left for her shift. He wasn't actually sure what he was checking on other than that it was still in there and not on fire, but it made his stomach rumble so that had to be a good sign. According to the Post-it Note she had left, it was time to put in the veggie casserole.

His tasks completed, Liam returned to the living room with a glass of ice water for Aunt Minnie and glasses of soda for himself and Theo.

Theo brushed his fingers over Liam's knuckles as he took the drink. "Thanks, babe."

"You're welcome, uh, snickerdoodle."

Theo arched his brow at Liam but didn't say anything.

"Would you like to see pictures of Teddy as a little boy, Liam?"

"I sure would!" Liam shot Theo a wicked smile and took a seat next to him on the couch.

"I was a cute kid," Theo said with a cocky smirk, showing no signs of embarrassment about the looming trip down Memory Lane and into his childhood.

"And always so confident." Aunt Minnie patted his arm before reaching over the edge of the couch for the oversized white purse she had brought.

"I'll get that for you!" Theo bounced out of his seat and went around the side of the couch before the elderly woman could lean too far over.

"Thank you, honey."

Liam tried not to laugh as she held the rim of her glass against the mouth of her mask and took a noisy sip of ice water.

"Liam, why didn't you get her a straw?"

"Sorry, cuddlemuffin, I didn't think of it."

Theo rolled his eyes and set Aunt Minnie's purse next to her on the couch. "I'll be right back."

"I'm so relieved Teddy is staying here," Aunt Minnie said after Theo had gone to the kitchen. "I heard a horrid rumor that he was living in his truck."

"Not my snugglebug!" Liam assured her with a grin.

"Oh you're so precious!" She clapped her gnarled hands together and her mask clicked and hummed with delight. "I brought gifts! I was going to wait until after dinner, but I simply can't contain myself."

Liam laughed nervously. He had no idea what to expect when it came to a gift from a Dread Doctor.

"Teddy, guess who I have in my purse?" Aunt Minnie said as Theo returned with a straw and slipped it into her glass.

"Who?" Theo asked pleasantly, sitting back down on the couch and crowding close to Liam since half his original spot was occupied by Aunt Minnie's large bag.

" _Who_ she has in her purse?" Liam whispered to him, alarmed by her choice of interrogative pronouns.

"Fuzzball!" She declared, unzipping the front flap of her bag and pulling out a rectangular box wrapped in gold paper with a silver bow.

"Fuzzball?!" Theo's scent flared with excitement and he grinned like a child on Christmas morning. "I thought The Surgeon threw him away?"

"He did, but I fished him out of the trash before it went in the insinuator. Now that the old bastard's dead, I decided it was the perfect time to give him to you." She handed Theo the gift.

"Who's Fuzzball?" Liam asked, eying the package cautiously.

Aunt Minnie's mask clicked in a tut-tuting fashion. "Haven't you ever mentioned Fuzzball to your boyfriend, Teddy?"

"It was too painful," Theo whispered, reverently cradling the gift in his lap. Aunt Minnie rubbed his back, and after a moment Liam squeezed his knee and leaned into him.

Theo took a breath and gently tore away the gold wrapping. Liam bit back a gasp as a patch of gray fur in a glass display case came into view. A few more tears and Liam recognized the animal as a large, gray rat. It was standing up on its hind legs, its forepaws frozen in a playful curl in front of its body and its long, hairless tail wound loosely around the base of the display stand.

Theo let out a little squeal Liam had never heard before and clutched the taxidermied rat to his chest. "Thank you, Aunt Minnie!" He gave her a one-armed hug and kissed her cheek before placing the case proudly on the center of the coffee table.

Liam didn't think his parents would appreciate Fuzzball's final resting place, but he and Theo could discuss that later after Aunt Minnie left. Liam cringed as he realized the immortalized pet was probably going to end up in his room, but Theo looked and smelled so happy that Liam almost didn't mind. He wrapped an arm around Theo's shoulders and his stomach fluttered as Theo turned his megawatt grin on him and patted his thigh. Pretending to be Theo's boyfriend was fun.

"Liam, here's your present." She pulled a long, slender package wrapped in silver paper with a gold bow from her purse and passed it to Theo to hand to Liam.

"Oh you...shouldn't have." Liam resisted the urge to shake the package, which was heavier than he expected.

"I think you'll like it, dear." Her mask clicked and hummed in the contented way it had earlier as Liam unwrapped it.

Liam's gift wasn't in a clear display case like Theo's – a good sign as far as Liam was concerned – but instead was in a hard container reminiscent of a jewelry box except much longer. He lifted away the top of the case and tilted his head in confusion. At first he thought he was looking at a long dagger, but as he examined it more closely he realized it was in the shape of a claw.

"What is it?" Liam asked, hefting the metal weapon into his hand.

"Once upon a time my colleagues and I made some enhancements for a powerful werewolf alpha who would eventually become known as Iron Claw. I harvested that from his body when he died."

Liam gasped and dropped the blade back into its black velvet case. "So that was actually someone's claw?"

Aunt Minnie clicked with laughter. "Don't worry, child, I disinfected it."

"Liam." Theo elbowed him in the ribs and frowned. "That's a very valuable relic."

"Um, thank you, Aunt Minnie."

Aunt Minnie reached into her bag and pulled out a small leather pouch, which she handed to Theo. Liam recognized the scent of mountain ash.

"Give your boyfriend a demonstration, Teddy."

Theo smirked at Liam and poured a handful of mountain ash into his palm.

Liam swallowed and backed up as much as he could without getting off the couch. He trusted Theo, but he couldn't fight the panic rising in his gut as the chimera gave him that damn mischievous grin while holding what to Liam was a highly toxic substance.

"That'll hurt if you get it on me," Liam said, not so subtly warning Theo that he _did not_ want to mess with Liam when it came to mountain ash.

"I'm not going to get any on you," Theo answered with a frown. He leaned over the coffee table and made a small ring of powder next to Fuzzball's case in front of Liam. "Try to touch it."

Liam started to protest but decided it would be easier to humor Theo instead. He braced himself for the burning shock and thrust his finger against the invisible barrier. "Oww!" Liam jerked his hand back and glared.

"Now poke it with the claw," Theo said.

"What? No." Liam pursed his lips and shook his head. "It'll deflect the claw and shock me since I'm holding it."

"Try."

Liam gritted his teeth and snatched the iron claw from its box. He thrust it against the mountain ash ring before he could change his mind. The painful jolt he had been expecting never came. Instead the mountain ash barrier erupted with pale blue light, sizzled and popped, dimmed and flickered, and finally went out with a screeching whine. The scent of singed energy hung in the air as Liam waved his hand and arm over the small circle.

"Wait, so, I can use this to escape mountain ash?" Liam held up the claw in awe.

Aunt Minnie clicked and hummed an affirmative.

"Thanks, Aunt Minnie!" Liam tucked the artifact back in its box, mind racing through all the times the iron claw could have helped him and his pack in the past.

Theo cleaned up the mountain ash, and Liam set his gift on the table beside Fuzzball. The group then turned their attention to the photo album Aunt Minnie had brought. Theo held it in his lap and flipped the pages while the other two crowded close.

"Oh my god, you were so cute!" Liam bumped Theo's shoulder.

"Toldja." Theo smirked proudly.

"I have a copy of this one on my fridge at home," Aunt Minnie said as she tapped a finger beside a picture labeled _Halloween – Teddy age 8_. In the picture Theo was dressed as a mini-Dread Doctor, but in place of the menacing helmet, neon blue swimming goggles were strapped to his mop-top head of dark hair. Novelty plastic straws were taped to the top of the costume, replicating the hoses of a real Dread Doctor's suit, but with cotton balls stuck on the ends so Theo wouldn't poke himself.

"Here's one of me and Fuzzball," Theo said quietly as he turned the page. In the photo, young Theo held the fuzzy gray rat in his lap while he waved to the camera. Plastic dinosaurs and Legos covered the lab table in the background.

"How long did you have him?" Liam asked.

Theo turned to Aunt Minnie in question.

"About six years."

"I thought rats only lived about two or three years?"

Aunt Minnie's mask clicked as she turned her head toward the taxidermied pet. "I operated on Fuzzball numerous times, especially toward the end, but eventually his little body rejected the new organs."

Theo smiled at Fuzzball, then threw his arms around Aunt Minnie in a spontaneous display of affection that would have stunned Liam back when they first met, but which no longer seemed unusual for him. Liam rubbed Theo's back as he hugged his aunt.

Liam laughed out loud when Theo turned the next page.

"Aunt Minnie! Why did you take this picture?!"

She clicked with laughter. "You were so precious marking your territory."

In the picture a young, gangly black wolf had his leg raised next to a bicycle.

"I can't believe you used to pee on your stuff!"

"It was instinct." Theo growled and shoved Liam. "And just be glad I can resist now," he added with a wink.

Liam's mouth dropped and his cheeks heated in a blush. What did _that_ mean?

A few minutes later the oven timer went off and Liam stood to go to the kitchen.

"You need some help, babe?" Theo asked.

"Sure, puddin'pop."

They went to the kitchen and Theo swatted Liam's shoulder. "What's with the hokey names?"

Liam shrugged. "What's with the 'babe'?"

"We're supposed to be a couple," Theo answered.

"Well if we were a couple I'd have hokey names for you." Liam grinned and handed Theo the oven mitts. "And you're just lucky I went with puddin'pop that last time. Pee-pup was the first thing that popped in my head."

"I'm going to hit you." Theo snarled playfully and set the casserole dish on the island counter.

"Sure you are." Liam chuckled and stepped into Theo's personal space.

"You don't think I will?" Theo asked, tugging off the mitts and tossing them on the counter.

"Nope – weewee-wolf," Liam giggled and reached over Theo's head to the cabinet behind him for plates.

Theo growled and grabbed Liam's sides, rough fingertips pressing against his ribcage as he blocked Liam's attempts to open the cabinet door.

Liam snickered. Theo's fingers were rough, but they didn't actually hurt, and his claws weren't out.

"We used to claw and punch each other all the time," Theo said, even as his grip softened and he rubbed Liam's sides.

"Used to," Liam whispered, winding his arms around Theo's neck and relaxing against him.

"You'd break my nose, and I'd shred your shirt or knock you out." Theo's hands trailed down to Liam's waist, and bands of gold illuminated the edges of his hazel eyes.

Liam smirked at him. "Yeah, and that was _after_ we started being friends."

Theo laughed and pulled Liam closer until the fronts of their bodies were in full contact and their faces were only inches apart. "What are we now?"

"We're pretending, Theo," Liam whispered.

Theo stiffened and let go, but Liam gripped him tighter and smiled

"Pretending, to just be friends." Liam cupped the back of Theo's head and pressed their lips together. Heat that had nothing to do with the open oven a few feet away washed over Liam's body and left him breathless.

"I'm done pretending," Theo whispered against Liam's mouth as the kiss ended.

"Me too," Liam answered, his top lip dragging over Theo's bottom one.

An animated, clicking hum interrupted them and drew their attention to the kitchen doorway.

"This one's going in the photo album!" Aunt Minnie lowered an old fashioned camera and pointed with her cane at the oven. "Don't forget the roast, boys."

Liam's eyes widened as he realized Theo had only taken out the casserole. He snatched up the oven mitts and thrust them at Theo.

"Thanks, babe."

"You're welcome, sweetlips."

Theo groaned and set the roast on the island. "I hate you."

"I know." Liam chuckled and nuzzled against Theo's chest as Aunt Minnie snapped another picture.

 **-000-**

 **End Notes:** I hope you guys enjoyed this bit of Thiam fluff. If you did, feedback would be greatly appreciated! I may still write stories for the other Thiam week themes even though the event is over.


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